Sista Nicole passed me a link on MSN, as is her usual style of dropping interesting reads onto me. The news: some researchers found that gay folks not in unions were more likely to end their relationships, compared to gay folks in civil unions and married straight folks. You can read about it here.
A recent article by Dave Muskera asks why we bother jumping into marriage… given the high divorce rates and how marriage is not a guarantee of relationship satisfaction. [I have also previously argued that divorce is not a bad thing.]
“Wouldn’t gay marriage result in gay couples staying together because of legal encumbrances? Don’t we want to promote real love?”
Real love and marriage are not incompatible.
While marital life may not be all airy fairy and wonderful… and while some people screw their marital lives up… that doesn’t mean that a marriage covenant is meaningless.
Just because lots of people break promises doesn’t mean that making a promise is meaningless. A marriage covenant is a celebration of commitment and love for each other. It’s like a promise to be a source of support for each other through thick and thin.
A promise can be meaningful and beautiful- as long as it is feasible and reasonable.
If a promise is broken, it doesn’t reflect badly on the promise…
… It reflects on the circumstances, other factors and/or the covenant parties. [To varying degrees of responsibility, depending on the case.]
“A marriage is a promise between two people… okay… then why bother the government with it?”
Yes, the fight for gay marriage is not a fight for recognition of our love. We don’t need anyone else to tell us our love is real… we know our love is real.
The fight for gay marriage is about facilitating love.
Not to be left at the door in agonizing anxiety when your partner is in the hospital. To protect your spouse in the event of death. To celebrate your love according to the customs of your faith (e.g. Christian lesbians and gays).
If you love your partner, you want her/him to be protected.
And so i believe in the covenant of marriage…
… and i believe in the fight for gay marriage.
